I knew it was a matter of time, but we got the call today. My sister in law is pregnant with #2.
Her husband called Champ at work today and just blurted it out. I appreciate that. It wasn't a big announcement, it was over the phone, and I didn't have to hear it with my own ears to try and fumble out and appropriate response. You know, one that didn't involve me bursting into tears or making a comment like "must be real effin' nice."
When I got home, Champ was waiting for me with an uneasy look on his face. "I got some news today... got a call from Andy...."
I said it before he could get it out. "She's pregnant." What else could it be?
After confirming that yes, she's 8 1/2 weeks pregnant, Champ kept searching my eyes - waiting for me to lose it. But I didn't lose it, proof positive that therapy works. This news three months ago would have shattered me. But I am getting stronger. I'm learning that another woman's pregnancy doesn't take anything away from me.
Am I jealous? Um, yeah. Am I happy for them? I'm trying. I love my niece to pieces and I know I'll love this new baby as well. And they're wonderful parents. Good people. I'm sure they agonized over how and when to tell us the news (we are the first people they've told).
But man. There is something about hearing a pregnancy announcement, especially from someone close to me, that leaves me feeling pretty freaken sorry for myself. It's a "Why not me?" "What did she do to deserve two babies??" and "fuck everything and everyone!" reaction. How nice it must be to decide to try for a baby and then actually get pregnant.
It's actually good timing at least. Leaving for Mexico in two days is definitely easing the pain a little bit!