Tuesday, May 1, 2012

BFN

Peed on a stick this morning. Negative.

I'm trying not to get too down about this because it's still pretty early (I'm on day 23 and I think ovulation happened on day 11 or 13. The fact that I can't tell for sure via my chart should probably be a red flag). And signs of ovulation at ALL is a huge improvement over the past five months of nothing. Plus I totally expected this cycle to be bad, because of all the running I've been doing.

But it's Hubs' 29th birthday and I had this little scene in my head of wrapping up a positive pregnancy test and giving it to him tonight for his birthday.

I'm trying not to dwell. At least I had reason to TAKE a pregnancy test. I haven't needed to POAS since... gosh, probably September?

I go back to the RE on Thursday for a check-up to see how these estrogen pills are working out for me. Here are my goals for the appointment:

1) Tell him the pills are awesome. I feel at least 75% better than I did before the estrogen.
2) Discuss current cycle and possible ovulation. Get a beta test.
3) Discuss NIH study in Baltimore. Request referral letter. If I do the study, I get all kinds of free testing that my insurance doesn't cover, which may help me get to the bottom of why the eff I have Ovarian Failure at age 29.
4) Request referral for therapist. (PS thanks to everyone who gave me advice on how to find a therapist in this post).

In other (happier) news, I ran a half marathon (13.1 miles) race this weekend and I totally ROCKED IT (for me). It was my fourth half marathon and I beat my previous record by 16 minutes (!!) and increased my speed by a minute and 15 seconds per mile. Which is CRAZY. My finishing time was 2:01:53, with an average pace of 9:18 / mile. My full marathon is in less than three weeks, but I think I'll be ready!

Thanks to everyone for the awesome ICLW comments in the past week. Having support in the blog world is amazing.

7 comments:

  1. That's awesome about the marathon. I don't think I could run unless something was chasing me!

    I hope that you get some good news at the RE. That would be amazing to be a part of the study and get more testing done.

    Happy Birthday to the hubs and sorry that you had a BFN. =(

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  2. Sorry about your negative test :(, but congrats about everything else! (You snuck a lot into this post!) I hope your appointment goes well, and congrats on your half marathon.

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  3. That is an amazing time! I'm so impressed! And excellent list of topics to discuss with your doctor, too. I'm glad to see you being proactive!

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  4. Oh Jen, sorry for the BFN :( that sucks, but like you say at least you had a reason to poas, celebrate the small victories!
    But huge congrats on the 1/2 marathon PB! Keep telling myself to sign up for a proper run but currently only manage 3k so like 1.5 miles on a treadmill!!

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  5. Congrats on your PR and hope you kick butt in your full in 3 weeks!!

    Also hope you get into that study!!

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  6. Congrats on the half marathon! Sorry to hear about the BFN. What do the estrogen pills do for you?

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    1. The estrogen pills have cleared away all my hot flashes and the TERRIBLE brain fog I was having (I look back on November - March as "the lost months" because my brain was completely absent!).

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