Tuesday, March 6, 2012

What Modesty?

Today I went back to my RE for an ultrasound and some blood work. Usually, it's just me, the doctor, and the nurse in the room during my pelvic ultrasounds. During which they stick a long wand up my lady parts to poke around and look at my uterus and ovaries to see what kind of slacking they've been doing lately. This morning, however, there was also a resident doctor, as well as an ultrasound technician guy. So four peeps. Looking at my lady bits in person and on a screen. Fine, whatever. I have very little modesty left.

*This part gets a little gross and graphic. Sorry. Infertility can be gross and graphic. *

Did I mention I am on my period? Yes. I am. And did I mention that this is like the period to end all periods? I am practically gushing blood. It's like all the periods I missed over the past year got together and decided to have a party at the same time. 

So back to this morning. The resident doctor pokes around with the ultrasound wand; the doctors make notes on the sizes of follicles, discuss possible treatment, talk about blood tests, etc. And then the resident removes the wand, which is covered in blood. The wand has a plastic wrap around it, so he takes off the plastic and then like holds it up and awkwardly fumbles around the room, while still talking. Four pairs of eyes couldn't look away from this plastic wrap full of my blood waving around in the air. And it just kept waving.

THROW IT IN THE TRASH CAN! (this is me, silently willing him to stop waving it around). AT LEAST COVER IT UP..... FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, STOP IT!  

Several agonizing seconds later, the nurse took it out of his hands and threw it away. Thank God. She apologized afterwards for the humiliation. I had to just shrug it off. Yep. Modesty is definitely a thing of the past.

1 comment:

  1. I'm sorry but your description of the resident waving around the plastic cover made me laugh out loud. You have to laugh at this stuff, or else cram your fist in your mouth to keep from screaming! I've requested that residents not be a part of my "show". Sometimes they are so awkward and new I feel I should jump down off the table and tell them how to work the wand!